How do you spend your weekend?
Before dialysis, my Saturdays were adventures with my wife. We’d hit different farmers markets, catch a movie, or drive down to North Carolina to visit her family. We planned trips, made memories, and lived with a kind of freedom you don’t appreciate until it’s gone.
Now, my weekends are dictated by my dialysis schedule.
Spontaneity is out. Rigid planning is in.
A perfect example is an event we want to attend in a few months. Most couples would just pick a date and go. For us, planning starts now. We have to map out my dialysis days, figure out what time we need to leave the house, what time we need to be back home, and how to make sure I’m hooked up to the machine on time. Every decision has a medical shadow attached to it.
Planning isn’t new to me — I’ve lived with this routine for a while.
But for my wife, it hurts. It hurts because she’s chained to my dialysis schedule too. It means we can’t spend Sundays with her family because we need to be on the road by six. It means missing loved ones who can only meet on Sunday. It means watching her sacrifice moments she deserves to have.
People often think dialysis only affects the patient.
But like cancer, no one fights alone. Everyone in your life fights with you.
I’m searching for a kidney not just for myself — but because I know what it would mean for her. Independence. Freedom. A life where she isn’t tethered to a machine right alongside me.
We fight this together. And together, we’re holding onto hope.